It’s pretty fast to build relationships that stay on the surface. But surface-laying relationships are not satisfactory and leave us with a deep sense of loneliness. Besides, in order to feel connected and in order to feel that you belong to a community you have to build deep relationships. It’s not easy for many reasons and two of them are: first when you try to build a deep relationship you need to get involved, and this involvement means you have to engage with people in some way; second, when you try to build a deep relationship many people try to take advantage of you so this makes every one of us staying on the defensive, on both sides.
How can we overcome such difficulties? They are very challenging.
Surely, they don’t fade away overnight. We need time to build such kinds of relationships. Surely, we need to find a reason because, as formerly said, you have to get involved (and so engaged), this means you cannot build a deep relationship with everybody. The problem with this second point is that usually, you know if you would deep connection with someone only after you have just started the process (because you need some interaction time to know someone better).
I don’t have a solution, everyone faces this challenge as they wish or can. On my side, the only thing I can do is to be as honest and sincere as possible. And even if this can seem simplistic in reality this is a big challenge. Because many people don’t deserve or/and aren’t able to deal with my sincerity. And I need to understand to which people I can be sincere.
But when you succeed to build such kinds of relationships, it’s a great goal. Not only because great communities are deep-relationship-based communities, but mainly because that connections are very meaningful for you and you can count on them.